for you

it was never easy. it was never hard either. I didn't expect you to come. And I haven't expect you to leave yet. How silly things were. for a 14 year old kid. like me.

things between us, were never not complicated. 

don't complicate it, they say. complicated, we say. 

the feelings, faded, along with the memories. it were all as if they have been taken away to a better place. where there are rocks and sands and sunsets. who kept them safe and warm underneath the sea. 

i told you to never leave. you promised that you never will. in the end, I made you leave. and so you leave. 

it was never not easy. but it was, once.

amazing how you could know. the inner and outer side of me. the inside and out of me. the good and the bad in me. 

unbelieveable how after only four months, you can already know my darkest and my dirtiest parts in life.

funny how you could turn my bad atittude into a good one. perfect, how unexpected things were the true ones.

it were all so beautiful. at first. annoyingly adorable. crazily clingy. and deeply in love. 

but then, things happened. 

surely, better things are yet to come. I'm never gonna write you the why and the how. 

you're the most heartbreaking thing that could still hits me so hard, right in the face. every single time, even right now. 

yea. the minute we cut things off, are still the worst part of my life. 

my biggest weakness. was you. and still you. 

those were the nightmares. 

if i could just turn back time, i'd never pick you. 

you're an addiction. 

the only guy that has been born so attractive in every terms. 

he used to be so charming, once. 

and he stills now.

this was never not that difficult also. things has been acting so kind and nice. for us. the both of us.

Untill one day. us both stop giving nor taking, nothing but gave up

you gave me everything, instead I gave you nothing in return. you made time. i made troubles

it was on me. 

yea, put all the blames on me. since it really is. 

believe me when i say i'll never regret for ridiculously doing this.

if only i know how challenging could things be towards me, how damaged my heart would be and how great enough the pain was to destroy me, 

I'm never going to bother about you. 

Its been a year now since we first talked. {supposedly}. 

Things happened. Feelings fade. And people change. Thats how life were written to be. 

and this is how it were meant to be. 

got nothing else left to be said,

just wishing you to have the best in life. 

thank you, friend,

for all the goods and bads.